To Start

The decision to grow a family is never one to be taken lightly. It's a decision based on one's inward outlook on their ability to provide for children; to facilitate life. This decision is not to be taken lightly.
More often than not, one is caught up in their own concepts of self to fully consider what the needs are of a child. It's not wrong to be in love with  being in love with your child. But that is really not the point. I myself have relished in the glow of being a mother. Loving a child with every fiber of my being, from the depths of my soul. I myself have forgotten all other life on this planet to focus myself on that child, two children to be exact. I will never regret a single moment spent hurling myself into that devotion. But moments come in the duration of being a parent that require you to live outside of that glow, and focus solely on the child.
What is best for my child?
What does my child need?
Am I enough?
 I've rolled the latter question over in my mind more often than you can imagine. Am I enough? Am I good enough? Am I good enough to facilitate life? I find divinity in the question itself. Early on in life, the answer was a clear cut, unquestionable, no. The idea of being the sole provider of another human being was beyond me. I was neither set up nor emotionally ready to be that person, for anyone. When my life opened itself up to the possibility of a child, the idea was planted and I began to imagine what that endeavor might be like. The thoughts filled my mind for the better part of every day, trying to plan out the intricate details and finite logistics of what daily life would entail. If I had spent every second of every day thinking about it, from birth.........I would still have been a world away from reality.
There are no words to describe being a "parent." I'm really surprised there is a definition in the dictionary- But let me be clear, it is vague.

¹par·ent

noun \ˈper-ənt\

1

a : one that begets or brings forth offspring

b : a person who brings up and cares for another

2

a : an animal or plant that is regarded in relation to its offspring 

There you have it. Three descriptive sentences that sum up being a parent. 
I'm appalled......